eBGEhA I value the article.Really thank you! Fantastic.

what a neat way to go

I sort of wish that the sister and mother found out that their plan backfired.

I agree with Barbara Lynn, the lack of quotation marks and other gramatical errors detracts from what otherwise is an erotic, sexy, satisfying tale with an unexpected ending.  

The plot was great, but the writing could have used the help of one of the volunteer editors on StorySite's author's page.

Please write more, but pay more attention to grammar or get help from an editor.

SS

Great story mad but fun

Sue, the premise and the plot were good. However, there leaves a lot to be desired in the English department. There is no punctuation, no quotation marks, and at one point in the story, you misused the word faint, as you spelled it feint.

To faint, means to lose consciousness. To feint means, like if you act like you are going to hit someone, and pull away at the last moment before the actual hit.

Not only are the two words spelled differently, but they also have two separate and very distinct meanings.

But as I said the plot and the premise of the story are good. You just need to redo it and repost it, cause I could swear that a ten year old wrote this and not an adult, because of the missed punctuation, lack of quotation marks, and misspelled words. All of that detracts from the meaning of the story, and shows a hurried, I want to get this over with, attitude on the part of the writer.

Barbara Lynn Terry