I really liked the first part.  The second brought more of the story and still was good and it created a desire for the next chapter. the last chapter seemed to be by a different writer. It seeemed hurried and eratic in its pace and plot.  I think you might improve this from a nice story to a great story by checking your outline and reworking the last chapter.  Your characters were suficient until you changed them all in the final paragraphs. Sub plots were ok and fed off of the main plot till the whole story flipped with the "revelation". A read through by a mature editor or proofreader might have eliminated the changes in the narration, and would have definitely helped to pace the last chapter better.  I would like to see more of your stories.  
 --A side comment-- If there was an account of a substantial nature in a local bank, then any credit claims would have served notice and the accounts (not amounts) would be disclosed through credit bureaus, or claims paid before repossesion or eviction would take place.  The legal department for  the small banks would safe guard their deposits from fractious claims, at the depositor's expense of course.  I doubt that a cashiers check for a million would be cut in that casual a manner.  In at least the last ten years, the moneys would be transferred electronically to another depository.  It is very, very difficult to get large amounts from a bank in negotiable form.  Federal forms have to be filled out for transactions one, one hundredth of that size.

I gave up, the constantly changing point of view simply lost me.

You have to decide who is going to be the narrator and stick to it. You seem to want the narrator to be third-person omniscient. But who would a nameless, faceless narrator refer to as "mom"?

Jill

Looks like you didn't like where your muse was leading you (the almost incest was bad) and just decided to end it.

Goodness, what a shock parts 2 and 3 were!  A nice little story was brewing in part 1.  What happened?  Did you get bored, Dear?  It was as if the effervescent organic matter hit the hyperactive ventilating device.  Too many plot elements.  The very best short stories have a single plot arc, a payoff, and maybe a twist or two.  Not that your chosen elements weren't fun, they were.  It's just that there is no way to do them all justice in a single short story.

What a lovely start to a story.

Dialogue for two characters should never be placed in the same paragraph. It makes it very confusing for the reader.

You might want to rethink some of your dialogue.

You said  -  Jon, honey-I'm afraid your dad had a terrible accident on the way to work this morning and he didn't survive the crash. For now, you are going to have to take care of yourself until we get the financial mess he left straightened out.

How about, "Jon . . .. Honey . . .." Jon knew instinctively that something horrible had happened to his father. "There's been an accident. He was on his way to work. You know how he complained about the drivers are on highway 168. He died instantly."

Jon's eyes shot open. "No . . .. That can't be. We're going to work on the computer this afternoon. He wanted to show me his new website. You're wrong -- he can't be . . .."

She shook her head. For a moment she talked without thinking, her grief overcame her normal good sense. "I don't know what we're going to do. Your dad's been out of work and we've spent almost all of our savings. I don't know what we're going top do. I just don't know."

Jon had never seen or heard his mother like this. He also had never been fatherless. It was a lot to absorb. He wanted to cry. He wanted things to be different. He wanted his mother to be okay.

Had I written this story I would have written it from the boy's point of view. You would gain a lot of immediacy.

Good luck.

Jill

Great start to the story, but I agree with the others- if it's a serial, please say so from the beginning.  please dont tell me this was meant to be a one-shot.

Hi Zoneefem
I like the start to this story. But I have to agree with Jezzi's comments.

I enjoyed this as I was reading but became frustrated when I found that, like a number of your other stories that are listed as "complete" this one wasn't.  I don't mind serials or multi-part stories, but please have them listed as such so that we readers know what we are getting into.

how exciting, i can't wait to see what happens next!
what is his dad's secret product?
why is mr. Jones so happy?
who will be the chair"person" of the board?