Yeah, I know this is another bad story, and I didn't like it.
I'm really sorry!
Silvia.

THE SECOND PART STARTS OUT GOOD BUT ENDS UP CRUEL I HOPE THOSE BOYS GET ARRESTED FOR RAPE THAT IS NOT GOOD FICTION. BE TENDER, SEX SHOULD NOT ENTER IN TO IT UNTIL THE CHARACTERS ARE 21.

Not a bad story, but poor continuity and atrocious spelling.  Get an intelligent person to check it out--don't trust spellcheckers.

I'm enjoying this story, but there are a few embarrassing errors.
Liquid is stored in a vial, not a vile.  The upper leg is the
thigh, not the thy.  Breast forms don't giggle, they jiggle.  In
addition, the breast forms were applied for the first time twice--
once in school, once at home.  She also (as previously noted) had
her ears pierced twice.
.
This is too good a story to be spoilt by careless errors.  I agree
with Nora that this needs more careful editing.
.
--Pervy

Dear Patricia,
Did anyone check this story for continuity?  I found it very distressing to read that in the nurse's offics Patty had her ears pierced by her mom and sister, putting in diamond studs, then her mom gives her a special panty to wear that simulated a female front for her.  Next we go to a beauty parlor where her mom has her ears pierced 2x and she has differant earrings????  Then once again, she gets up the next morning and has problems with fitting her male bits into a pair of panties????? PLEASE, at this point you are stretching my ability to cut myself off from reality and enjoy the story line.

I think that you need to have someone re-edit this chapter and repost it in corrected form.  Other then that, I did like the idea behind the basic storyline.