This is one of your best stories.

You need to appeal to the senses more to pull us in. How does he react to the taste, smells, and textures of lipstick; for instance? Does the "idle" chatter of the girls while they golf put him at ease, or does he miss the one-upsmanship of the boys. I loved the way cutting out his extensive "waggle" helped his game. This was excellent foreshadowing that he would find feminine life superior to his male existence. Also along that same line was the fact that he had to hold back during the tournament.

What? No Caddyshack quotes from the guys? What group of males can play an entire round of gold without quoting Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murray, or Chevy Chase? When they first saw the enfemme Andrea, wouldn't at least one of them say, "Hey, we're all gonna get laid!"

A little more time spent on the set up would have paid big dividends. The protagonist needs to be dragged into this kicking and screaming. What if they play a round of gold to decide who will be the woman. He could be certain he would win and then through chance -lose. On the first hole he could leave his putt short and have then start on him about putting like a girl. Something about their normal kidding could get under his skin. Maybe some hidden desires? He should resists the women's initial efforts, setting limitations until they prove to him that he's just one of the girls.

Don't you find it a bit absurd that there are so many scratch golfers in this foursome? A friend of mine has won several state amatuers and he has a two handicap. What are the odds that three scratch golfers all will hit horrible drives on the same hole? On the other hand, it was very realistic that the "girl" made the putt.

Wouldn't Andrea be asked several times which of the men was her husband? Wouldn't the men she met assume she was a loose woman given that she was "playing" with three men? Would she wear a ring and claim a faux husband?

Didn't she have any problems whatsoever to overcome? You cheated us out of her decision-making process along the way. Show us more about her and how she plans to make her transformation work within her professional life.

You often duplicate lines changing the wording but not the meaning. Readers like economy.

Show us -- don't tell us. I would love to rewrite several of your stories to show you what I mean.

Jill

Loved your story, as usual. You've given me hours of pleasure. If you were here, I'd hug you to thank you. Keep up the sexy work :)

Marci

Hi Jennifer, I enjoyed this story alot. Thank you, Fran

A pretty good story with no humiliation for the main character. A few but not enough to significantly detract from the reading.

Heh great story; we call that format a Texas Scramble in the UK and I have to say that if I could play as good as Andrea....;  Anyway, a really 'nice' theme story.  Look forward to reading more
Love Tina xx

A wonderful story and I agree with her. Who would want to go to a Superbowl when you can have a retreat as one of the girls. When I read the summary I didn't think I'd like it as much as I did before reading it. You really are a terrific writer.

This was a really fun story, and I enjoyed it very much. I don't play golf myself, but the comments about the experience of playing the lady's game sounded very credible and well-observed. The "best ball" format of the final game sounded a bit odd though. Are there reallys such competitions, or was this just a story device?

What a nice sweet story.  I know Mark/Andrea's feeling:  I never in the world thought of dressing in women's clothes, yet when Ia at age 52, reluctantly put on a dress for the first time for aa part in a play, like Mark, "something clicked"